So, I have no clue what's up with me and Emily. I don't know if we're friends or dating or more or less or what, so I gotta figure that shit out. Jeremy...*sigh*...Jeremy. Well, we broke up, but he still wants to be friends, which is cool I guess, but it'll be awkward for sure. I dno. So, I'm supposed to go to Vanessa's house and spend the night Monday and get drunk and high with her sisters. I don't know if this is going to happen or not. I don't exactly know. V said she's prolly be pissed at me for it, and I DEFINATLY don't need to lose more people in my life. Especially not my best friend. I mean, I want to get drunk/high to know what it's like, but if Vanessa really feels strongly about this, I don't want to do something that she thinks is gonna be a bad idea. As far as the rest of my life goes, I don't really have one. I've spent a lot of time with bigT lately because he's been staying at my house (except at night), so we've gotten along pretty well, and we've had some fun, but *sigh* I just..I dno...I feel alone and empty. I don't know why because I have my family (I don't mean blood, I mean V and bigT), but still...I just..I dno...I feel empty. Oh! And I got a "warning citation" today. I accidentally ran a red light. Like, I was looking, and I saw it, and I stopped, then I looked around and went RIGHT through it. It was horrible too, because there was a cop sitting RIGHT THERE. *sigh* I was FREAKING out too. BigT was like "calm down, everything's fine.." and I'm like, "No, you don't know my mom. I'm not worried about the cop, I'd rather go to jail than home to my mom with a ticket." But I didn't get a ticket, I got a warning, so I'll tell Dad and Mom won't know. And it's not like it matters that much, but I still didn't wanna deal with it. You know, I guess, to be honest, at least it was something trivial and I knew what I did. It wasn't like, speeding because someone in the car was about to throw up because they're drunk off their ass and they're youngin's or something. lol So anyway, that's about all for me lately.