it is the start of my 3 day weekend! im sipping coffee. cant seem to get motivated to do much of anything besides make an awesome french toast and fried banana breakfast. its cloudy outside today, of course, on my day off, the sun is not shining. i really need to get some sort of a workout in today but i havent even put pants on yet. i may just take a nap, its been at least an hour since i woke up. my paycheck was supposed to be direct deposited today but it wasnt. so annoying. now i have to go to work to pick it up. but it may be a good excuse to walk on the beach even if it is cloudy.

had a moment of weakness last night. my relationship with neil is over. i know its for the better. i literally feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. but there is times where im feeling lonely and wish he were still there for me. i really am happy about not wasting time with someone i know im not ever really going to be with. its just a bummer that he seems indifferent about it. isnt that how it always goes? i will get over it, obviously. i just had too many glasses of wine last night and got upset about it. eh.