where are you? can i not just look in between the short, flat-topped buildings and find you? i sometimes feel that my will is not strong and that i am dumb. i may not have that elusive, unspeakable attraction that is demanded of me. can’t we see that at first it does not even need to mean much at all? i know that maybe i have not yet mastered that language that i will need to use. you cannot still be hiding in my head. it’s been far too long and i know you came out some time ago. if there were a transit system and i were to use it, i bet you would be sitting in a seat a few in front of me and maybe to my left. i don’t have to be above anything at all, nothing over heads or clouds, but i’m sure that can be seen, surely. i don’t have to use the satellites in space and i should think not the tricky electronic things, either. really and truly, we can live in anything that anyone would like. it will be great and brilliant and marvelous, like pyramids. when i look over my shoulder it’s all smiles, so i would be able to show you all that, too. i searched in forests, in cities, in schools, and on roads, on plains, and on drugs. come on, we can jump in water and be whales or dolphins and we will be swimming and we can bathe all day and jump back out when we want to breathe air up there again. together, the both of us, we can be glad and we can be damned. the nations, they can fight, and the land, well, it, too, can be cleared, but it will not startle me or upset me. the places in this picture are amazing, and free, too. what does it matter when floods bring rubble and dying? i always say wrong words at the best times.