I am cool because when I drive my car the music is loud and the bass causes me to receive unsightly stares from the elderly. I am cool because I buy clothes at Urban Outfitters with pants that have saved me the trouble of wearing them in and t-shirts with useless pictures slightly off-centered. I am cool because the amount of minors I've gotten is higher than my GPA. I am cool because I listen slightly underground music that speaks of my apathetic disposition. I am cool because my sideburns stretch down my face and I show that I have matured enough to grow sufficient facial hair. Little kids idolize me. i'm cool cuz i type like this and evry1 rights on my facebook wall and it doesnt matter to me when i say your and i really mean you're I'm superior and better than everyone else because I notice these things that make people feel comfort that they are part of a group and well liked. I'm better than them because I'm non-conformist and well read. I am a better person because I know good literature and good films. I'm better because I have slight, although entirely benign, mental problems that allow me to know real pain and real hurt. I'm better because I'm not afraid to use words like "beautiful," "captivating," and "existential." Fuck. We're all trapped in this hole.