I feel mad for some reason. Like I just wanna grab something and rip it to pieces and BLAH. Well...I do have one piece of news that probably won't interest anyone, but I'm sure as hell proud of it. I hit him. He came up behind me and touched me and I just whipped around and I knocked him to the ground. I wanted to bash his stupid face into that concrete or kill him with the house keys or whatever but I was so mad. Madmadmad. It scared me a little. Blood everywhere. I hope I broke his nose. Matt's very perky. Had a lesson on Riley today. RMI Chateau Elan show coming up this weekend, it's a three day, but i'm only showing saturday and sunday. I like that arena. Nice jumps. I'v finished that one shot fic thing. I hate it. I might put it up anyways.. I am so sick of how I write. Maybe I should just quit. I honestly suck, anyways. What the hell is wrong with me? I'm having nightmares again. Dark night loud music. A hand. Come with me no god save me shut up you bitch pain pain pain and i cried and i thought he would kill me because there was a knife at my throat and i couldnt scream couldnt move and oh god. I need to stop. STOP. Lord, help me, save me, comfort me. I need it most in this time.