Dreams. I performed in a stadium with Jared our routine for class. There was silence the entire time. nothing from the crowd. After the dance i'm at the school and these girls start talking about the performance, and they say all these things like the guy looked bored i looked horrible and there was nothing interesting to it. I ran into the bathroom and all my girl friends were there and they told me how awful it was and how boring it was. I remember shaking Life. i went to look at pretty dresses with Emily Kirsten and Clancy and i found a dress that i really quite liked. i felt so perfect. You know how sometimes you try somthing on and you feel like your butt's too big/small or you need a smaller shoe size or just a few inches in height or something? I put on this dress and i felt perfect. But even if i bought the dress i'm not sure i'd ever get to wear it. I was going to ask a boy to the Sweetheart's Dance but i'm worried that things might get awkward. and after that? what's next? Jr. Prom? what junior would ask me? Sr. Prom? i'm not sure i'll go to that one either. Maybe i'll buy the dress and just be pretty for the Variety show... if i'm even in it. I'll just have to dress up and cry at home. ... *sigh* At least i started my painting yesterday. i really like it.