I've had alot of thoughts and concerns lately, but I had the biggest one of tonight.

I've had a lot of Epiphanies standing in my door just looking at the sky, and none more important than tonight, because it was several, and everything happened in about 20 seconds.

First, I really figured out, at least in part, of why I'm how I am right now, and in short, I'm really lost, and alone.

And I also realized something else, I realized how my dad is helping me, I asked him for the last alcohol beverage in the fridge, figuring he might want it, and he said "Yeah, but theres none for tomorrow then." And it hit me, he knows I'm going through a tough time, hes seen me through tough times before but he knows this one is especially hard, and it shows, and he bought the alcohol for me, in moderation, to help me relax, the same as why he leaves me a few cigars every morning even though it costs him more, he just wants to help, and he also helps by not asking about it, and giving me a lot of space.

And I just realized, thats what I need to be doing as well for someone else...

Ockham's Razor - The simpliest, most obvious answer is usually the correct one, and it finally makes sense