*sighs* its so hot...wonder if its possible to drown in ur own sweat? Yeh...gross ay...Lol. Well Lochie came back today...I might get to see him this year...yay...That'd be good...I need to no...I have this feeling somewhere in me we will end up together...I hope so coz its going to kill me if we dont... I was thinking about Andrew the other night...I cried...I havent cried coz of him in ages...I wasnt crying this time because of how much I miss, or becoz of how much I love...I think I was just remembering how great what we had was and then how it was all a lie...on his half anyway...I do miss him sometimes...But when you loved somone as much as i loved him...I guess u can't not miss them...I dont love him anymore...he's hurt me to much for that...But...part of me will always love him...I guess its just...this week...Him and ski will have each other...and Its goin to be me on my own...its either always been me and her or me and him...Now its him and her and me on my own...I duno what thats going to be like. This guy wants to hook up with me...Everyone tells me he's to old...he's only 5 yrs older tho...Like i said to her...its my fuckin life and ill do wot i fuckin want. But then she told me to look at what ive turned into...apparently some fake, and a slut...somone who pretends to be dumb when their not, has sex with anyone who will, drinks and smokes...She asked me why...Couldnt give her an answer to that...Neways...Since I dont think I have actually said it yet...Happy New Year everyone...Hope uz all have a gr8 yr...Mwa