My weekend kicked ass. First off I went to a huge house party Friday that kicked severe ass. I got pretty fucked up on beer and vodka. I met all kinds of new people and had a shitload of fun talking with new friends. Then, I woke up at 8 a.m. with the biggest hangover of my life. So I slept until 4 back at the dorms and then hit the road for Cleveland to see one of my friends play guitar in a punk rock show. It was just a small gig at a battle of the bands in some high school. Its so weird to go back to high school and see all of the people I used to be. But while the crowd was young, the bands were all college age and older. Dead Ringer, my friends band, kicked ass. Huge crowd response, huge mosh pit. People were thrashing all over the place and one girl got a bloody nose. However, the band didn't place because early on, they told one of the judges to fuck off because they weren't allowed to perform their intro. It didn't matter though, it was still a great fuckin' show. After the show, we went to this party where there were jello shots and a shitload of weed. I think I had 5 jello shots, about 10 beers, 2 joints, and 3 bowls. Thats pretty hardcore for me, but that wasn't all I had. We went to another party after that with all of the band members and I drank 5 more beers, a shot of vodka, and two more bowls. This part of the night was a little foggy needless to say so my count may be a little off. The band jammed out in this apartment for a while and it was just a party all night long. I didn't stop partying until like 7 in the morning. It was fuckin' intense. It was cool meeting all these new people. For me, this sort of party was really sweet, but for most of the people there, it was everyday. They just party all the time and don't give a fuck about anything. They just have fun. They work for their money during the day and party all fuckin' night. That seems pretty sweet to me. In many ways, I wish I could live like that. However, I've recently realized that, while I do love that lifestyle and put it into practice often, I do need something more. I need to further myself. I need to learn new things and discover new places. I need to become something more. Those people will never change. They don't need to and more importantly they don't want to. They are happy and they have found their niche. I love those people, but I will never really be one of them. Not that I wasn't welcome and not that I couldn't easily become like them, but I just need to be something else all of the time. I need change in my life. Thats why they were so interesting to me. They were a whole other group with a whole other philosophy than the people around me most of the time. I was able to learn from them by experiencing their lives for just a little while. I want to be more like them, but I still want to be like the other parts of my life too. This weekend has really shown me a lot about the way we develop. We are all the result of years and years of our experiences. Everyone has their own set of experiences and everyone creates their own environment. Each new environment we visit becomes a part of us in some way. Each passing moment is a part of us. The times we have become who we are. The people we meet, the places we go, the choices we make, they are all part of us. We are the result of our environment and our environment is the result of us. We are what surrounds us and we leave a part of us in our surroundings. Oh, and I made this in my downtime today.