When my mom gets drunk..all we ever talk about it my dad and Gary and nothing I ever say matters. We were talking about if my mom regrets her decisions with my dad and she said deffinetly not and shes happy and life in my house is better without him. It really makes me feel like shit when she says that. Then gary was getting all jealous and hes like if you wanna work it out with Bruce, it's not too late. My moms like NOO! ITS OVER BETWEEN US AND WE WILL NEVER GO BACK! So yeah, that made me feel nice. My mom also thinks that shes a failure and shes going to hell because she promised "death do us part" to god with my dad. My moms point is that her and my dad are apart and not dead. Idk. I dont think SHES a failure..I just think that the MARRIGE failed. But she was like "I've never failed at anything. Everything I put my mind to I succeeded in. I Passed all my classes, Im my own boss, I have wonderful kids, But now i live with my failure and all my bad choices everyday of my life." I feel wicked bad when she says that shit. idk. I feel myself getting shittier about this. Sometimes I just wish they would be with eachother again and this would all be over. Then I asked my mom if my dad is a bad father and she gave me this look like she doesnt wanna talk about it. Then I asked her again and she said that hes not a bad father but he could be better. She said that hes sinking into what he was before and shes scared for him. This is becoming to complicated not to mention Sherry was acting weird with my dad today. Like shit isn't the same or something. idk. But i feel really stressed out about it. I hope Tony calls soon because I really need to talk to someone about this. Well its like 1:00am so he better hurry up. My mom n Gary are upstairs "sleeping" or something so whatever. I told Melissa I would probly call her tonight too so maybe I'll be doing that soon.