i'm not apart of it. no matter how hard i try. but do i care enough to really try? i don't think i understand the concept of a second-chance. just becuz they didn't run my survey doesn't mean they're not going to run my other stories. they did run my column. that's important. that was my story, my idea, all me. except for what they took out. i want to write something that's going to make people laugh. something people can look forward to. something that can take people away from making those boring movements thru life and sit down and take them away. i want to mean something to someone. to everyone. i want to be good. when i really want to, i can write tremendously well. just becuz i want to be good at something doesn't mean i'm automatically good at it. it takes practice to get to be where i want to be. a journalist. not just some shit paper writer. that people can tear out and wipe their asses with. something people subscribe to each month. just so they can read something I wrote. something i made. i want to help people without actually having to deal with them. that's mean, but true. i hate people but i love giving them advice. over-opinionated, under-acknowledged. all it takes is someone to listen, to read, to see. i could be everything.