well tusdays i got a fone call form merci saying she wanted to hang out but i also told tammy i would try my best to hang out wiht her becasue i wnt be able to see her until the weekened witch will be fun. I had to say to say yes to merci i felt really bad casue i barly hang out wiht her naymore and she told me that herslef. Then i tod i woud hang out wiht her then she told me not to hang out with her cause I felt bad...but like inside i did wnat to hang out wiht her but i dont think my voice sounded it...she came to my house and then we walked to bug light and layed in the grass witch was what i needed ..juts to relax and even better get to catch up wiht merci and just be myself...we tried to find dan but i guess he was in the hospital casue he broke his collar bone again skateboarding...i guess he called merci at liek 11 when he got back form the hospital and they made plans to hang out..so yesturday i went to kieras house and me an dher walked to mcdonalds then to kellys so she coud get ehr cell fone then to my house. being wiht kiera makes me happy..i dont knwo shes just so energetic and positive and liek i talk about anythign wiht her and knwo she understands and she knows she can talk to me...at times i dont knwo how she smiles and stays as strong as she does.She reminds me of an angel..it sounds corney but i just think of that everytime i see her. So after that we dropped kiera off and then i went to mercis and we waited for dan and we kicked around the soccor ball and laughed and juts talked about the usall stuff..dan called when he got out of drivers ed and then ran into josh on his way to mercis and told him to meet usdown at the pitt..when we got down there dan went ot get josh and merci smoked...then when josh got there they dug more in there pitt that they have..i guess they are making a have pipie in there witch should be cool...i hadnt ever really hung out wiht josh before except that time with jarred when we all went to the beach...josh is cool kinda qiute and half the things he says i dont even get...as they were digging merci collected every worm thy found..thendan put on of a safty pin and they all went fishing...i kinda was in my own world..alot to think about...then josh went home and meric me and dan went to mercis then to sperwink then the club to see if nayone was down there..no one was i told dan iw asnt goignt o skool today ..i just dont feel capable of bein around all those stupid kids wiht out goign off and ripping all there heads off..i feel so mad around them ..maybe becasue they cant realated to me and they all are soo judging witch bothers me the most. So im gunna go lie down til ihere form dan then him comming over?