so i have desided to start writing in my dairy again... so Im rather upset right now. My mom told me i was selfish amung some other mean things she has said. She said I have chosen to live with my dad...i never choose... I remember the day exactly I was at my friends house and my mom stopped by and asked me to go grocery shopping i declined and said i didnt want to and i would be home in time for dinner...I never saw her again...She doesnt understand how I waited and waited for days on end to see her car pull in the driveway It broke me and i was only 5 how could you do that to you duaghter you love at the age of 5. And walk in my life two years later expecting me to call her mom. My dad is all I know and over the years have learned I can count on the most. She left me there. Who was selfish then. I dont think she understands how much pain she puts me through when only saying a couple things. It gets to me no matter how hard i try to ignore it. My dad is all i have and has told me many times I have saved his life in many ways. When my mom was in and out of rehab my brothers were sent to foster homes and my dad refused to give me up he told the social workers I was his and thats the way things have been and I thank god He has supported me and never given up on me in times When i would as a parent just walked away. he has guided me in timse when i coudnt see the answers clear and never let go of my hand once. " your everything I have victoria and i Will see you are happy everday in your life even if it kills me" my mom has never said anythign like that to me and when she deos say things to me in a mean manor my dad is there to say sorry that she makes me cry and hold me...everytime hes there even soemtimes when i dont want him to be he refused to leave and pulls me tward him and i can just let go becasue i feel safe.My dad has been my family for the last 15 years and never has let me down once. Honestly he means the world to me. And i wouldnt trade him for anything. And in my life its hard because these are the years of my life when i need a mom to talk to to understand me and i just dont feel like i can talk to her about anything...Me and my dad have this open relationship and know the do's and dont's and thats becasue over the years we have learned and expericed from eachother. I remember when i was little I used to want a normal family it was everything I dreamed of but over the years I have learned there is no such thing as a normal or perfect family and to cherish everythign you got becasue some day it might not be there. So im sticking with the man who has never left my side and would give anything for me, my daddy, I love you so much