I just cant look, it's killing me I'm so tired right now, without any particularly good reason. Ballet exam was ok. The pianist played some things about 10 times too fast, but we got over it. ITs all up to the examiner now. Friday was good. went to a random youth event thing. I started off siting with ami n rach n sally for t meal, then sam decided thaaat he wanted me to sit with hiim. so i did. its absurd how happy it made me just for him to say susie come and sit over here. the rest of the event consisted of general discussion about sex and relationships. which couldnt have been more awkward at certain points. but it was still good. Saturday, or yesterday to it's friends, was good. Went into school at a ridiculous hour in the morning and sat in a corridor. in 'silence'. so muchos sitting, giving me a chance to listen to music and actually do a little thinking aswell, i came to absolutely no new conclusions and had no revalations of truth turning around my empty little life, infact it just made me more upseet cos i was thinking about exactly the wrong things. this was interspersed with small comversations with little people doing the 11+, some of whom were very cute, others were little brats, others were very upthemselves. one girl, and i quote 'all I like about maths is equations'. equations?! in year 6. i think thats one whos getting in. also interspersed by food breaks, free lunch in the staffroom and two drink and biscuit breals led to claudey and discovering more about the consumption of bourbon biscuits than we ever thought was humanely posible. Claudey made one last for half and hour, by just sucking and licking it, muchos respect to her, i have found that i just dont have the will power. not only did we become experts on bourbon biscuits, but also on Mosambique, as it was infact the country of the month, as the board opposite us in the corridor was more than happy to tell us. I could recite to you the appearanc, history and reason behind the flag. aswell as numerous pointless facts. for example, did you know that portugese is the official language of Mosambique, even though only 8.7% of the population speak it. This is because Mosambique was ruled by Portugal until it gained independance in i think 1849. i bet you didnt know that. *feels intelligent* last night was the anniversary supper. the dance went well, we didnt stack it or forget it, which is a bonus. dad now wants us to do it at the lighitng up brentwood, which could be interesting. then went zoes for a sleepover. ended up just lying on the floor, cos there was no room for me on the sofas. then i fell asleep. soon i woke up and zoe asked if we could move the big matress so i could sleep on that. so we lugged the matress across the room, then i went to the loo, got back and found there was no room for me on the matress. certain people scrawled across the whole thing and wouldn move. so again i ended up on the floor with a blanket and was fucking freezing all night. ah well. back to school again tomoro, and i cannot be even remotely arsed. well, not as if i can do anything. maybe i'l just go to bed insanely early, then it wont feel so bad. it had better. i hate mondays. ciao xHUGx