Well i told you you might be blessed with a non-thursday entry, and here it is. Although it wont be the bucket of loviliness my last few entries have been. Thats probably the problem with non-thursday entries. I don't know what i'm feeling about the party and evrything. I was just trying so hard to do the right thing, no matter how much i love being drunk, I know i shouldnt do it. Hearing how pissd everyone got, and how much 'i missed' at the party. It doesnt help. I'm gonna end up being such an outcast in YP cos i'm one of the only ones who feels i shouldnt get pissed, i'm quiet when it comes up in conversation, and i always have to find a way of getting out of parties wihtout offending anyone. But what annoys me most is that i like it as much as the next person, so why am i the only one (apart from a few obvious exceptions) who has a bit of self control and realise that life isnt all about being a rebel and getting pissed, and going deliberately agains the law, your parents, and most importantly God, isnt the way to live life. No, it was a good job i didnt go to the party, God knows what i would have done to some people if i'd been drunk. My sister is still shit on a stick. I'm not talking to her, the only time i've been near her all weekend is at the dinner table cos i couldnt avoid it. And i plan to keep it that way. I hope she doesnt think i'm happy to talk to her, cos i'd rather choke to be honest. She was annoying me alot today, one of the main reasons i was in such a shyte mood at church. Just another reminder that everone else in the world still sees her as the perfect little fucking angel she tries to be, and it's only me who seems to have a problem with everything she does. I heard her and luke had an argument last night. I laughed. It's valentines day soon. I've been thinking about that too much recently. never a good move. why does my pathetic mind always feel the need to convince itself that this might be the year when i get something. I'l go thorugh every possibility in my head, no matter how hard i try not to. i think that about sums up my sunday.