Being blanked by the guy you like isnt nice. not when he was the one thing getting you through the day through the week through life. not when he was at last the one worthwhile thing to look forward to something more worthwhile than a blade to get you through the day through the week through life. cos at last you didnt want something you hated, more than hate itself, more than all who hate and all who use it to get them through the day through the week through life. at last there was something good at last you didnt need to hide it or pretend it wasnt the one thing getting you through the day through the week through life. at last you didnt need to go against everything you were at last you didnt need to get pissed, you didnt need blood, you didnt need to turn into the person you were always scared you would at last there was something more than nothing to get you through the day through the week through life. but when that time comes the few brief minutes that you had been waiting for with him and you the only time you were going to see him the thoughts and the smiles that had distraced you from everything else, that helped you just get through the day through the week through life. and if he ignores you as if you just werent there and all your worst fears come true the last tiny flame of hope is blown out and you know that it's not worth trying anymore youre going to have to find something else to get you through the day through the week through life. but what can you go for? what can help you? cos when theres no reason not to why not just do it? when theres nothing else getting you through the day through the week through life why not? take the blade it'll help it always does and you can go back to having the thing you hate as the thing getting you through the day through the week through life you can go back to hating yourself wishing you could ignore yourself, just like he did wishing you could ignore what you'd done wishing he could still be the one getting you through the day through the week through life.