whoa is my life. love it love it love! School was okay...ha. I love love love my adult rules class and I want to be just like mrs falslev. Really, having her career. we wrote where we will be in 2,5, and 10 years. oh baby, am I no longer afraid of the future! BRING IT ON! ahem. I had a little heart attack in the hall when I was expecting to talk to malc in the hall. I did of course see him with lauralee. But, for the first time in forever he didn't stop to talk, he waved and kept on walking. I am surely not used to that...and I AM surely used to being the center of his attention. well, at least he acknowledged me. And I mean...he is one of my best friends and of course I do love him as a brother... sigh, it was like a punch in the rib! A burn. Why!? well, of course I do know why...but the thought came to me, this was exactly what I wanted! The friendship part from our relationship. oh, but... okay... I was jealous. of what, I don't really know! for being me I know the least about myself! ugh. Anyhoo. I know if I told him that it was just...abnormal to see that sight. see him talking to another girl...told him how I felt jealous (I'm slowly reaching that point where I will not be in denial) I know he would probably stop. Oh, but that's sensless and stupid. what?! anyways. kaylee and I went to 7-11 for slurpies after dropping clancy off. Then I walked over to malc's tennis match. I sat with liz and we talked. For being so intimidating she is one of the few people I can really be open with. I feel like she's really listening. we talked about relationships. She says I am just afraid of a good thing. Possibly. yes. yes. yes. she said her friend even said something about me. oh what was it? well anyway, I said I'm just scared. she filled in the rest. scared of them leaving me. well anyway. about the match. I thought he did great. yikes, liz wasn't praising him at all. It made me sad. I guess I know nothing about tennis, but I thought he looked good. I talked to him a little after his match. I said he looks kind of cute when he's sweating like that. Dang, I would do anything to make that kid smile. yeah. now me and kaylee are doing our homework together...probably not until 9 at this rate... but yes! and we're watching 13 going on 30 and eating BEAN DIP! I love my life!