Maybe it is true, perhaps I am just attracted to power. But there is so much more that ties me than power. For a split second there is a time that I acutally feel happiness, a happiness that seems to be absent at every other time. But I fear I will screw up, I fear I will hurt everyone that I touch. Sometimes I wonder if I should just leave, disappear and never speak to any of them again. Wouldn't that make it so much easier if I could just leave it all behind. But I fear that no one would let go, and I know Malachi could send people to find me, it might be difficult to run from him. But maybe I could convince you that if would be for the better if I disappeared one day and never spoke again. I truly am sorry for loving.