( 6:15am ) I had the most weirdest dream...wish it didn't end too. It was mainly about me, Matt, Sarah, and Mike. I was like screaming at Sarah's parents to let Mike move in with them and Matt was like I don't know sneaking around and his parents caught him and started yelling at him and I started yelling at them. There were other people in the dream like Joe, Andrew, and Nick and all them. The last thing I remember was Matt holding me in his arms and kissing me...it felt so real...I woke up thinking he was gonna be right there lying next to me and he wasn't, it was all a dream...I just wanted to die right then and there. When Matt moves...I hope he says goodbye first and possibly give me a goodbye kiss...that would make me feel so much better...to know that he still cares. But I know that will never happen :( That song "Getting Away With Murder" by Papa Roach...one of the songs that Matt plays all the time...came on twice...one after the other...it's like trying to torture me or something. Right now I'm waiting for Sarah to come over so she can go on my bus with me this morning to school. She has to get her $10 back from Stefano that she gave to him to buy himself pot lol. UPDATE: ( 2:35pm )... Well Sarah didn't come over this morning to go on the bus with me, she just left like 10 minutes ago. To my surprise before I left for school, Matt IM'd me...so we're talking again and he doesn't hate me thank God. Katie went to slap me in the face during lunch but she wound up slapping Matt in the face. He bugged out. She tried taking his chain from him in his hand cause he was gonna hit Martine with it. She tried punching him in the nuts...and boy did he bug the fuck out. He grabbed her by the throat and everything. And supposedly Matt isn't moving anymore...*big smile* Gym was pretty cool today...we chilled in the weight room...guys did pull ups and girls did the flex arm hang. Last year I had 21 seconds, today I got 27...I'm getting better at it lol. Better than most of the girls who got 0 lol like Alicia and Zinab for example. Ohh man I can't stop coughing...I seriously think I have Bronchitis again...I'm gonna try to go to the doctors this week, I can't take it anymore! Now if only I could get Ron to not hate me anymore...things would be somewhat back to normal. Grr everything is so fucking depressing! Just got off the phone with Corey...he wanted to know why me and Sarah kept calling him *rolls eyes* UPDATE: ( 4:25pm )... Jen stopped by and she started blasting rave music so we're dancing in the middle of my street lol. Then we see Stefano and Tommy F. walking down Brandywine so we called them over. They wanted a ride to Danielle's so we drove them there...and chilled with them but they wound up going into the woods with Kevin, Lisa (a bitch in my class) and some other guy. So me and Jen rode up to Corey's house blasting the music really loud...he heard us so he came outside...and I just started club dancing in front of him...he looked at me like I was nuts lmao! I was like "I'm really hyper" and he's like "I can tell" lol. Jen dropped me off back at home after that. UPDATE: ( 7:00pm )... Wow, people from Brick talk and start so much shit it's not even funny...and they can never seem to back it up either. They bug out over the stupidest shit in the world. ( Conversation with Nikki... ) xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: u fuckin whore .. u deff. have no friends ... u juss try to make it look like u do... u try to act like ur so hott nd shit ...once again there is no need to put conversations in ur journal .. essp. ones with me ... JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i kno im not hot, im not a whore either i put da definition in there 4 ya if u havent noticed JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: get ur shit str8 b4 iming me bitch xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: my shit straight .. ur the one who starting a lot of shit xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: and i know what a whore is and u deff. are one JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: IM STARTING SHIT I DIDN'T FUCKIN DO NETHIN UR DA WHO FUCKIN IM'D ME WITH THIS FUCKIN 2 YR OLD SHIT JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya cuz ronny payz me 2 have sex wit him *sarcastic* xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: ur the one who posts 2 year old shit on ur journal xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea i bet he does xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: i bet a lot of guyz do .. i bet all those guys u have on ur pix site are all of guys that have payed u a good amount of money u fuck u JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: how bout u fuckin grow up n' fuck off, otherwise if u wanna keep fuckin runnin ur mouth den come 2 my fuckin house n' say it 2 my fuckin face JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya ok xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: like i would go to toms river JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i only fuck ppl i go out with JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: cuz ur a pussy xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea sure ... u dont know what the people hear in brick say about u xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: ur older then me .. i bet there is a better chance of u getting here... JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: obviously i dont care whut they say bout me cuz ppl in brick rnt any fuckin better JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: im not riding my fuckin bike 2 brick xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea we are ...arent u 17? JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya n' i only have my permit n' i dont have a car JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya sure u r JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: conceited bitch xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: brick is less dirtier then toms river .. i know too much evil already in that fuckin town xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: nd ur adding to it JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: lmao okay! JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: at least my skool doeznt have skanky ass hoez dat fuckin hook up behind stair wellz xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: like ours have that? JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: according to ron urz doez xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: u dunt go to mi school do u wouldnt know JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i really dont fuckin give a shit JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: u wanna talk shit JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: come here JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ron can drive u xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: my boyfriend is not letting me with ronnie at the moment .. because i have sumone that actually cares about me .... unlike u .. people juss use u JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: datz y ron n' jack tell me all da time dat andrew is using u rite xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea .. cuz ron nd jack dunt know shit xOoSeXyMaMiioOx is away at 4:44:33 PM. JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: andrew told dem himself Auto response from xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: if i had to choose whether to love you or to breathe, i'd use my very last breathe to say .:. I Love You .:. i love u so much andrew <3 JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya sign away bitch JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: dont fuckin IM me if ur gonna pussy out xOoSeXyMaMiioOx returned at 5:02:51 PM. xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: sorry if i was eating xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: god xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: and were u there when andrew sed that? noo .. soo fuck u xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: i know andrew cares about me .. cuz he doesnt make up a dumb excuse to leave when we are done doing shit .. like ron used u do to u JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: lol ok not my fault if u need a fuckin reality check JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: but ur makin urself look more like a pussy n' fool by talkin so much shit when u dont kno 1 fuckin thing bout me n' wont do shit bout it xOoSeXyMaMiioOx is away at 5:04:33 PM. xOoSeXyMaMiioOx returned at 5:12:20 PM. xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea whatever ... like u know what ur talking about either JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i kno exactly whut im talkin about JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: u dont kno me n' ur talkin so much shit bout me JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i was bein nice by tellin u whut i heard JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: but u just go off on me xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: ur deff. the one who is 2 years old .. u need ur friends to im me JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i didnt tell nebody 2 IM u JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: she saw da convo JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: she has her own mind xOoSeXyMaMiioOx is away at 5:15:22 PM. xOoSeXyMaMiioOx returned at 5:16:41 PM. xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: yea a mind like urs JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: im nothing like my friends xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: whats ur friends nameFOrEvER uRs 654O JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: alicia xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: do u have andrews sn JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: yes xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: what is it then JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: flip n es 411, globesk8r989, lombardo2289 xOoSeXyMaMiioOx: did u give ur friend "alicia" it JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ya cuz she wanted 2 kno it she used 2 talk 2 him ( Conversation with Andrew... ) LomBardo2289: take me off ur site LomBardo2289: and my gf's pictures JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: ronny n' jack r in those picz so i dont have 2 take em off LomBardo2289: yea u do u ugly shit JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i kno im ugly JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: doeznt bother me LomBardo2289 signed off at 6:45:03 PM. ( Conversation with Frankie... ) FCARGO 411: wtf man y u got our convos in yur journal? FCARGO 411: ?? JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: so FCARGO 411: so what? FCARGO 411: thats gay as hell JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: y doez it matter FCARGO 411: bcuz i dnt liek people knowin that shit FCARGO 411: u no how fats shit spreads JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: knowin whut shit FCARGO 411: yur convo about what we talked about? JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: therez nuttin bad in dat convo FCARGO 411: ok... nikki was sayin all the seuxal stuff on the bus JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: whut sexual stuff FCARGO 411: dude r u fuckin dumb? FCARGO 411: about the boobs the horny all that stuff FCARGO 411: ab big ass convo of it FCARGO 411: put it this way FCARGO 411: i basically fuckinhate u so go kill yruself JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i already knew u hate me FCARGO 411: good fuck bag peace JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: yupp JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: n' 2 think i thought u were different from da rest of em, i was right in da beginning, jess is better off w/o u FCARGO 411: good dick girl FCARGO 411: u fuckin chod FCARGO 411: fuck you JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: lol w/e u say, but i kno u wudnt say it 2 my face FCARGO 411: nd stay out of peoples live u do a good job ruining yurs so no one needs yru help JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: every1 comez 2 me 4 help u dipshit FCARGO 411: yeh yur a girl if u were a boy id fuckin kick yur ass JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: datz whut jess has been doin for da past whut 2-3 nitez FCARGO 411: i didnt fuckin ask u to help me FCARGO 411: i dnt fuckin care dick JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: i was jus tryin 2 be nice but i 4got ur a guy from brick their all assholez FCARGO 411: go fuck yur gay ass freshman boyfriend matt JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: im not goin out wit him JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: get ur shit str8 FCARGO 411: awesome if toms river girls r nething like u i will stay the hell away JeRzYzBaByGuRl4L: lol good If anybody else wants to talk shit...come to my house and say it to my fucking face...otherwise you just look like a complete fucking fool and pussy. GROW THE FUCK UP!!!