I just got back from church a little while ago and it was awesome as usual and we went to VONS and I grabed this flat thing that tasted like a churro and I saw some jalapeno cheese bread and grabbed that too. yuuuum I was actually pretty social.. more than usual. which isnt much but atleast it was better than last time. THis friday I'm going to this thing and Neil wants me to play/sing one of my own and I havn't picked up my guitar or touched this song in over 4 months. This is next week. It's not that I think I cant do it.. it's a matter of do I WANT to do it? Do I feel comfortable doing it? I can't do something if I dont feel right about it and no one can make me feel that way besides myself. So.. I need to pick it up and see how it feels. Again. I've been practicing Prisoner by Mariah for a few weeks now and it's a spiritual song but I don't think I could do it either.. no time. so bleh.. I saw some people I havnt seen in a loooong time today which was weird. ANd then i saw some people who acted like they didnt know me. but of course i acted the same way. it's my anxiety i swear. so whatever this entry sucks and im going to go now.