for this solitary moment i believe that i could be going insane due to several aspects: my untiring need to be overly annalytical (sp?), the fact that school needs to end and summer needs to come now, my ap book & the fact that the underground man's twisted remarks are intertwining with my own..maybe i just made that word up, the fact that i am at the moment mad at patrick b/c he probably couldn't care less but that i can't help but think that he does care and that i take things out of context, the fact that most of my friends here are heartless and i can't relate to them any more than i can relate to a fly, and my need to be with my friends in eldon but the fact that work and school are keeping me here........gosh...sorry...totally not directed at anyone in particular and i'm sorry b/c i'm just stressed and it's all seeping out. don't worry...i assure you that anyone who reads this are not taken into account of the heartless friends and the ones who i know will read this i love you and i can relate to you. i sound heartless now..but people make me mad. i'm just gonna shut up now. but this is a diary and i needed some sort of release from my own thoughts so here they are and i hope you don't hate me for writing them. in fact, please ignore this entry at all costs...thanks.