Hmm......Great music... ...funny people..... ....lots of dancing.... ..This is what describes my first stake dance... I had so much fun..It was like I could let my self free...ya know...just dance the way that I wanna dance and not have people make fun of me..... ...I felt like I let go of myself...but I had a BLAST!! I danced with Chris Blatchford, Josh Koskan, Jeff Harris, Jarren Poulsen...and yeah..I think that's it.... ..It was a ton of fun. I felt totally normal around Jarren,,,which is wierd...because normally I'm this puddle of goo on the floor when he talks to me.... ...I just don't know what to say to him...and I feel stupid....because I know that I will say something wrong......which sucks...because then I don't want to say anything..therefore...I don't say anything...and it bugs me.... ....But tonight..I was totally normal..we talked about...well....I'm not sure anymore...but we talked through 2 songs...which was wierd.....but yes...we did..... I felt all weird when he looked straight into my eyes..thinking back on it..I don't think that I liked it..... ..It made me feel all aware of myself....I think that I stepped on his foot once...but yeah..I'm not to sure......I like the way that HE led me....I mean..normally it's the other way around...if that makes any sense at all....hmmm....it does to me... ...I think that my crush or thing as some people put it..is starting to wear off a little...I mean..I still really like the kid...but I'm beginning to realize ( I think)..that things between us just.... ...would not work out.... ...It's hard to explain but yes....I hope that we will always be friends...I will miss him ya know...when he leaves...but....he has to go...and there is absolutely nothing that I can do to stop that...No one can do anything.... ...I hope he knows that his friendship means the world to me....and that I really do care about him...but it's Jarren..he's clueless (jk...lol). Everything was good and grand..until the last dance....I was supposed to dance with him one more time...I wanted to so dang bad...not because I like him...but because...I felt so comfortable around him.... ...I like that comfortable feeling..... ...Nicole was supposed to ask him to dance with me...but she ended up dancing with him....I'm trying so hard not to be mad at her...I mean..it's not her fault...Jarren just started to dance with her...But I thought that she knew how much I wanted to dance with him.... ..one last time..... ...When I looked over and saw them..I thought that I was going to burst into tears...I was so sad..so....let down..... ..but then Jeff came by and sat by me...so I couldn't cry in front of him.....I can't believe that I am letting such a little thing bother me so much.... ..it shouldn't matter......but it does....to me anyways.... ...Agghh..I love Nicole to death..I mean..she's my second half...for real........ ....But I really really wanted to dance with him..she knew how much I wanted to..she knows how much I care about him...she knows how much fun I had the first time that I danced with him....and I feel like she stole my dance...even though she didn't....... ...I don't know what to do...I don't want to be bitter...but I just can't help it..right now anyways...I just.....wish that I could re-live those 2 songs that we danced through..I felt like I was best friends with him....like...... ..I could tell him anything (I didn't though)..I just felt like......everything was so good. ..I sounds weird...but anyways moving on with the night..so.... ..after that whole episode I went out to my car.... ...it wouldn't start...which makes me angry...but I guess I left my lights on..even though I don't remember even turning the dang things on....hmm....oh well... ..So anyways this good friend of mine..Dan.....said that he would get his jumper cables and we would jump the car..I didn't think that he would do that..... ..I thought that he hated me..I mean..he did hate me according to M...but maybe she just got confused.... ..oh well.... so yeah..we went and got Jeff (he had a flashlight..but the batteries were dead)..And Jarren came along also...hmmm .... ..It was wierd...anyways to make a long story short.....we got my car started and we all lived happily ever after... ..I felt like such a freakin moron.....standing there..watching the guys fix my stupid car.... .....I didn't know what the heck they were talking about..which makes me want to learn more about cars...so yeah..I think I'll look some stuff up..or maybe daddy will teach me some stuff... .....But yeah...I am so freakin tired..and it's like 12:30 at night..What am I doing up so late??? ...Geez I really am a moron......