i have an EDrink! :D too bad it's a ..lost ..lol seein everyone around me havin probs in their relationships scares me senseless to think of what might happen with me and martin.. cause he lives soo far away, and i'm stuck here and don't have a way to get to him.. i keep thinking, "what if he doesn't really love me, and only *thinks* he does? would he break up with me cause of the distance, and i havn't been able to get to him yet?" maybe i should keep tryin to be optimistic. but i'm not really an optimistic person.. i hate always bein the one to have doubts about EVERYTHING and ALWAYS worrying myself til i'm sick.. literally sick.. if i had a job, i would be that much closer to actually being with him.. then the only thing that would stand in my way is my parents.. cause they don't really know about him yet (well, i told them about him when we first got together over a year ago. but i think they expected us to have broken up by now. and i asked crystal if i should still tell them again. and she said if i feel like i should.. but i'm scared.. lol). isn't life jus grand? :P