well, i couldn't do it. i took some sleeping pills and went to sleep before i could give further thought about killing myself. i'm sick of feeling the way i have been. so, i'm changing it. i'm not going to think about it anymore. i'm going to make amends with the people that care about me. i'm going to make disdain work. i'm going to live the dream, the very same dream that gave me the strength to pull through, the very same dream that gives me the strength to pull through every time. mister pink is BACK BABY. : P ***** liis, i'm sorry about the awful things i said, please don't leave us. what i said was a result of the frame of mind i was in, depression does ugly things to people. what i said, i didn't mean it. it's like i commented in your journal, i need you, you keep me company when i'm sitting alone at home and have nothing. please come back. : P