I always thought I wanted so much more... Days until I depart for Philadelphia: Eight... --- The great day of Saturday has arrived - it is currently 80 degrees outside with no clouds in the sky and bugs are flying freely and I cannot stand it. So last night I was online until 12:30 before Tom came in and was all time to shut it off bullshit and I responded in some way he must have not liked for I was threatened that he would poke my lights out. What the deuce does that mean? Anyone mind informing me? He told it to me exactly five times as well. Was I supposed to be scared and intimidated and think that he was in all seriousness by that threat which I still have no idea what it means, stupid blighter? -shrug- Went driving today at yet another parking lot and then we came back and drove on the neighborhood roads and I saw Mark in their car at the one little dead end things I ran into and if his own mother was not in the car with him, the same as mine then he probably would have brought violence to myself, to be specific - slapping me as he told me he would do at school if he ever saw me alone, anywhere. Maybe I should not have made comments about his gay brother at school last week. Bwahaha. Not that would be the only reason in which he would resort to violence, I just choose to not speak of those things said between us to anyone. John is gone for the weekend for camping and Nick has some chorus thing this afternoon and then he is going over to Adam's house for a sleepover. I am an only child, if you could call it that, for this weekend and my mother and Thomas are going to be going out to eat for dinner and I am to be left home, by myself. And what is it that I will be doing? Why drinking of course.. Yay for Jess! Because she has nothing better to do with her time but get drunk, cry and then when their is no pain to be felt, cut the ankles and wrists as I had resorted to seven on Friday night and three last night. The numb feeling - I really must say that I enjoy it more than the actual alcohol itself. May you think even if nothing is to come out of it... -_- And the eyes get red in the back of your head, this place will make you blind...