My old friend Joel came up from Milton Keynes to stay for a few days. We met in Krakow [Poland] summer '07. He came up thursday evening and we got drunk and went to the playground for a catch up. Next day we got the Metro to Whitley Bay, I've never been so it was brand new for both of us. Even though it was freezing I still took off my shoes and paddled in the sea. It was lush. Came home, got drunk. Joel went on a downer and there was nothing I could say to bring him out of the funk. I felt useless. Woke up, dossed about. Went to the cinema, came home ate and watched Spiderman and then went to the coach station for midnight. I miss him & love him but I can't be what he wants me to be. In worse news...Adam the lying, using CUNT has started seeing someone else already after all that bullshit about rushing a relationship. I feel like I've been slapped. She's blonde too. Probably prettier than me and sluttier in bed. In other words I wasn't good enough.