GOD i love Arab men.

I met one last night :] he was an App sophomore, Palestinian. I asked what his heritage was, he said Arab. I said I know, what country. He seemed shocked that anyone one asked. "Palestinian, and I'm safe!" My type, yeah. Palestenian, Lebanon, Syrian, I can't explain it; I just dig it.

I have always had this list of all the guys I want to date. I haven't dated any races besides white and Arab though. and I don't meet that many Arabs, but when I meet one in a social situation, I unintentionally always hone on that one.

Yeah, it was just bar talk. Samir (anyone else laughing at the super irony in that this name is just a more Arab version of my boyfriend's name?) was short. Shorter than me. Fun, GREAT dancer. Except he could go lower than me. But that's probably becasue standing, he simply is lower than me. SO attractive though. on the realz. Transferred from WCU. Charlotte native.

The girls and I went back to their apartment after the bar closed. Nothing happened, obviously. He was respectful. I didn't get his number. I haven't talked to him since. I did add him on facebook. but we haven't talked. Realisticly, we probably won't ever again.

I like to push the limits. I like to not mention the fact that I have a boyfriend. I don't lie if I'm asked. But I don't volunteer it. And I like to flirt. I like to dance with guys. I like to feel wanted. I do it for the attention. I know exactly why I do; because I crave male attention. I like to feel pretty. i like to feel like I can get any boy I want. I am in no denial. I like attention.

I am fiercely loyal. I have never, and will never, cheat. Sam knows I dance with other guys. Officially, he's allowd to dance with other girls; but he doesn't. Becauase he goes to West Point. He can't. He didn't even kiss anyone the entiire 9 months we were broken up. I think i wish I could say the same. Nothing good came out of the Aussie, for sure; or Nick. I guess Aaron wasn't so horrible. I guess I don't regret that. We're friends after all of it, even if it's a little embarassing when people find out we went out. Whatever. That was fine. And I guess I did get a decent friendship out of Tom. But no good came out of Andrew. Nothing but trauma came out of Andrew. I really, really wish that never, ever happened.

So yes, I dance for the conquest, with hot, arab men. I keep my relationship off Facebook, and I don't tell the guys I flirt with. Nothing ever happens. But I push the limits.

Ah well. I am in love. And I know I am in love. Sam is wonderful and I would never want to mess that up. I think we're doing it right this time. And, daresay (and I hope I'm not jinxing this), I could see it lasting for a while this time around. We've worked out so many of our issuess, and we aren't taking each other for granted anymore. But maybe I wouldn't need the male confirmation if I had a boyfriend who could go with me to the Klondike.

At the Yearling Winter Weekend ball, he told me he didn't want to join me at a club. Because of the one girl he danced with while we were broken. It wasn't fun. He wouldn't have fun at a club, he informed me. So I put my hands on my waist, and then I hit my dougie. We were like, the only people dancing. I. Hate. West Point. For SO many reasons.

He said going to a club with me would actually be pretty fun. He added, laughing, joking?, "but you're never allowed to dance with other guys anymore."