i dont know what happened today...it started out good... i got home and had an anxiety attack...i have no clue y...im so stressed right now all i can do is sit here and cry...and im not the crying type. i hate seeing my grandma the way she is...everytime i see her shes in so much pain and she always crying.i blame the doctor. im sorry, but if a 70 yr old woman falls, and she can barely walk, and nothing shows up on and xray....do a bone scan...dumbass. im going to college next year, and its 17 grand a year...i have no money...i can barely buy my christmas presents. My dads going to have to get a second job because he's not making enough through his own business...he wants to work nights...i dont want him to... i really want to go on the school trip to new york again this year, but they upped the price from 565 to 769...kellys mom offered to loan me the $250 deposit, but my dad said no....pride i guess... im depressed for some unknown reason...and im snapping at people left and right...i hate doing it, but i do....plus im pmsing majorly. i know this all sounds so petty, but i truly am grateful for everything i have but it seems like everything is going beyond my reach and i wont be able to get it back...its just floating away. maybe this all seems stupid to all of you, but right now, im on the phone w/kelly...not even talking....and shaking...ive finally stopped crying... Christmas in the Courtyard was fun! the highlight of my day!!