todays valentines day. but b and i are celebrating it tomorrow, since i have class early tomorrow morning, and no class on thursday. he hasnt gotten me anything yet. well, he gave me my gorilla already, and as embarassing as it is, i sleep with it every night. he keeps asking me what i want, hes bad at shopping for people, i told him if anything at all, nothing big and to trust his gut. i know what i want. i wont get it. i dont have that part of him yet. my dads girlfriend was over last night, and asked my dad if i had lost weight. the pants i wore to work today were uncomfortably big now. you know, where the crotch sags down and you have an inch of extra room in the waistline. i loved it. i get my hair cut and i will more than likely get my glasses on friday. itll be a mini makeover day. last night in my night class, we made valentines,balloon-powered paper airplanes, and read chicka chicka boom boom. yup. im in college. i went through my frogs last night. i guess i should tell you all that ive been collecting frogs since about my freshman year of highschool, so about 5 years. i got rid of so many. only kept the special ones, and when i went through the stuffed frogs, id forgotten i had most of them. so if i had no idea they were there, they got the boot. oddly, it felt very cleansing. right now, everythings good. very good. but ive been thinking about a mistake i made about a year ago. but while the end result was inevitable, as in i knew that it wasnt going to last when this all happened, it doesnt excuse it. it was something that i said that id never do, and definatley something ill never do again. i dont know if the person im talking about reads this anymore, and i seriously hope that they know who its about...and for that matter, what its about...all i can say is im sorry. and i know from experience that just that phrase does nothing to erase the feelings. but, its all i can say. i beat myself up over this, a lot, actually. and i truly do feel bad, i just hope you realize that.