I still can't really wrap my mind around this. Jordan died this week. I seriously didn't believe it when Bree told me. Like at all. I mean, I seriously just talked to him last week. He couldn't be gone, ya know? But he is. He was a couple months younger than me, was only home because he got mono really bad at the MTC. He was supposed to be going on a mission. Now he won't get to. Or at least, not in this life. I've been talking to Noah about it, he feels bad that he's back east because he can't be here for me. I wish he wouldn't say that, he'd been planning his trip before we even started dating, before we even met, I think. But as much as I'm glad that he's on his trip and getting a break from school and everything and getting to catch up with people from his mission, I do wish that he was here so that he could go to the funeral with me (I think it's on Wednesday). It's still all so shocking to me.