I need to think hard about this one... i need a job and i need a car if i can manage that. I believe I can accomplish More. Maybe moving out on my own is a better solution... I have people that love me and would care for me. And I have not given up completely. If I did. I would not be writing this... I just want you to know that where ever life may take me... I wont screw up my life. Sure there is the whole weed thing. But think about it... Im not twacked out or drunk... Im not doing it to purposely make anyone upset. I guess it is one thing that makes me feel more leveled out. Just as someone may need a teddy bear to sleep with. Or someone may need to gamble every single day. I know it may affect people but I just hope there would be more understanding The whole working in France is a AMAZING offer... trust me it would be nice to get away especially when all these things may happen. I want you to be happy, and I know being here is probably not going to be so great. You just have to Survive.