courts on the 20th right before my birthday.... who knows what will happen. but working with the dogs at the kennel helps . gets me out of my head. so does being with matt and walking jack. i can get up at 6ish in the morning no problem knowing i get to work with animals and hang out with matt. tomorro is the 4th. just another day. and my birthdays coming up. it feels like it will just be another day. other then my screw up things are okay again me and matt have been doing really great. we were fighting for a while just over dumb shit but now were having fun and just talking about everything. i would do anything for him. i should focus more on myself though but part of me doesnt want to because i know something is still not right.