i guess it is bad... i mean i couldnt even give my sister a hug after all this with the hand cuffs on. it didnt really hurt till then. plus begging for mom, even dad to get me out however they could and they couldnt. it really doesnt hit me till that. it really sucks it just feels like i am actually so screwed there isnt anymore reason to care. if i have to live at moms i just want a job. screw school for a year i mean i know things could be so worse but i just blah blah blah you know. it just really hurts right now. i love my friends. i know they all have problems too i know. but i guess must have them to. and... i have lost myself. i cant seem to find the old me. then again did i ever like myself back in that time.? it just sucks i make myself look like such a ass i must be a dissapointment... the drug kid. im waiting for the next mental breakdown.