I like franz ferdinand, that's what I decided to listen to, but I can only listen to the stuff on the website. I can't download the music, because my dad won't let me get kazaa again and I'm too cheap to buy ANOTHER cd. Come on I've bought like three in a month. Well that was two months ago, but how many of you can say that post kazaa being up you bought more than 3 cds in a month? Yeah I thought so. Maybe that's why the record companys want kazaa shut down.... My life is significantly less satisfying than this time last year. I think it's the lack of lust tward running and the lust tward my new girlfriend. Not new, just the same one, but you know what I mean. I feel distracted from my running. It used to be the most important thing to me, but now I'd give it up for her. Yeah I decided in Kearny during state that if I had to chose I'd chose her over running. That seems romantic to some because running is/was my life entirely for so long, but to me, it's depressing. Don't get me wrong, I like Jacki so super much that I couldn't write it, but running used to mean SO much to me. It was my world, but now my world is splitting and isn't focused. School running Jacki aikido familystill keepingmy bodyintact and writing. That's too much. It used to be Running School. I didn't have to hold anything together. And as for my body I got sick. I hardly ever get sick. And my knee is killing me, but I think I'll hide it in hopes that it will get better. I would not not run. I'd scream and yell at any doctor that told me to take a week off. I'd freak. And if I couldn't run I'd still kill myself. But if I only couldn't run for oh ... a year, I guess I'd survive. Jacki I think gets the point that yeah I really would kill myself. I don't have much to live for. Bye like I guess