Paulie: Lesbian? Lesbian? Are you fucking kidding me, you think I'm a LESBIAN? Mouse: You're a girl in love with a girl, aren't you? Paulie: No! I'm PAULIE in love with TORI. Remember? And Tori, she is, she IS in love with me because she is mine and I am hers and neither of us are LESBIANS! ------------------------ Tori: Paulie, listen to me ok, because I'm going to say this once and never, ever again. I will never love anyone the way that I love you. Never. You know that, and I know that, and I will die knowing that, ok? But it just can never... it just can never, ever, forever be. Do you understand? It just can never, ever, forever be. ------------------------ Tori: I mean I love Paulie, you know that I do. She's my best friend in the world and probably the only person that I will ever love like, like in the way that... Cleopatra [crying] Tori: And to hurt her, its like I'm choking, like I'm not in the breathing world. But there's this life that I am supposed to live, this dream that my mother and father had for me and even though it is killing me Mary, I can't ever be with Paulie ever, not ever, ever again. ------------------------ Everyone keeps telling me that this is who I am, but what if who I am isn't who I want to be? What if all I want is to be normal... for this feeling to just go away. It's all happening too fast. I feel like I'm on one of those spinning tea cup rides and, no matter how hard I try, I can't get off. I have no control over my life or where it's taking me and I want so bad to take control... but I can't. It's too much for me to handle. I don't want to be me anymore... I want to be somebody else. Maybe everything would be easier that way. There's a life I'm suppose to live. One that my parents have always planned for me... and this isn't it. This isn't what they asked for. They won't want a daughter like this. They'll be heartbroken... and disappointed... and everything else they could possibly be... everything except happy or proud, which is all I want... it's all I've ever wanted. But none of that's possible now... and I don't know if it'll ever be possible.