ashuhlee43: I've been thinking about everything the past few days... and there's a lot that I've wanted to say to you... but I don't know how. Xs and H0ES: just tell me ashuhlee43: I'm afraid to tell you Xs and H0ES: why Xs and H0ES: just tell me, really, you have nothing to worry about ashuhlee43: I'll try.... ashuhlee43: but you have to give me a minute Xs and H0ES: ok ashuhlee43: it might take a couple minutes to type... especially since I'm not sure what all I want to say, let alone how to say it Xs and H0ES: alright thats fine ashuhlee43: okay... ashuhlee43: I honestly don't know where to start... or what all I want to say... but I do know how I feel. And normally I'm good at expressing how I feel through writing... but not this... not these feelings. The past week or so I haven't been able to stop thinking about us. And I feel weird saying that, because we're not even an "us"... we're not really anything. Which is okay, I guess. But I like you. I know that I've already said that, so I don't know why I'm saying it again... but it's true, I like you. And it scares me so much. Everything about liking you scares me.... and for many reasons. One of them being the fact that I never know how you feel. I mean, you've told me you like me... and you've told me all these things... but then you go and put things in your info... or you'll have songs on your myspace that confuse me.... like the one you have now. I have no idea if you just like that song, like you said, or if it's about me... or if it's about someone else. You're never clear about anything... so I never know. And I tell you how I feel. I tell you what I want.... I tell you that I want to see if we work.... I tell you that I want to get to know you better. And I know you're scared.... terrified even.... and I know things are complicated.... and I know that it would be hard.... trying to make this work... trying to make US work would be hard. It'd be the hardest thing I've ever had to do... for so many reasons. But I'm willing to try it... I'm willing to see what happens. But I can't do it by myself. I can't make this work by myself. And I hate this... I hate feeling like I'm making you choose whether or not you want this. I hate feeling like I'm pressuring you into doing something that you're not ready for. But I need to know what you want. I don't want to guess anymore. I don't want to have to read something in your info, or on a bulletin you post... or listen to a song on your myspace and wonder who it's about... or who is to. I want to know that it's me. And if it's not... then fine... but tell me now. I need to know now... because if there's someone else... or if you don't want to see if you and I could work out.... then you need to tell me.... because not knowing is driving me crazy. I know how I feel about you... but I need to know how you feel about me. Xs and H0ES: i like you i do, before when i said i didnt know what i wanted and not to waste your time on me, i hadnt thought about it, but today ive had time to do a lot of thinking about everything, and i do want this to work, i really do ashuhlee43: you do? Xs and H0ES: yes i do