i'm slipping slipping backwards into my old ways running from the pain finding an answer in drugs and guys its not a good thing i dont wanna repeat my past but i am if i dont get help soon i'll be lost lost forever i know i say its nothing but its something when i say help i dont mean teachers and shrinks and crap like that i mean friends helping me thru this i need them to help me see that this isnt good that i'm ruining my life with this i know its not good the drugs the drinking the smokeing the guys its all comming back like a nightmare its like my past wont go away it keeps haunting me stalking me till i once again embrace it you dont know what its like teacher said i should accept my past learn from it yea i learnt that things were easyer then everyone was alive and happy i was happy happy thats something i havent been since i stoped how do i accept a past like mine you all think its candy and gumdrops its not it was hell it still is it wont go away its stalking me it will till the day i die so why not die? my past would go away i would be with him i might be happy again if i was dead.... i would rather be dead with him then alive without him! its not fair i just wish my past would fadeaway leave me alone not comsume me not hurt me -kristina