I need to type an entry. My dilemma is that the person I need to talk about knows about this journal. This could possibly lead to tension/drama. She is my best friend... my numero uno. I don't want to hurt her. I just get stupid, scared, jealous feelings I guess. I did have a long typed out entry about how much I love Austin and need Austin and how I would personally kill anyone who tried to take him away from me but my gay ass computer deleted it. All I have to say is that he is everything to me. My entire world... my universe. My heaven. I love him. The biggest thing that I love about him is his sincerity. I've never known anyone so sincere in my life. When he tells me I'm the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, I believe him. When he says that the word 'love' just doesn't cut it, I believe him. When he says he loves to make me cum, I fucking believe him. He's not in this relationship for himself... he's in it for me to make me happy as well as himself. I've never felt so loved in my entire life. I would die without him. A horrid bloody mess I would be. p.s. I will inflict the wrath of a psychotic, unaltered, ex-self mutilator on anyone who tries to change him.... he's perfect just the way he is.