832pm i loved todayy. the amount of happiness managed to balance out the amount of unhappiness. reasons whyy todayy shall be remembered as a happyy dayy: 1. it's official that i'm seeing a midnight showing of harry potter with two of myy bestest friends. i'm kinda worried about elleryy being in the same theater as myy parents, though. because myy parents are asian [hehe], and theyy do know of our weird "historyy", if youu mayy call it that. 2. as was just sitting there at lunch todayy, and a leaf flies into myy hand out of nowhere. the leaf somehow found its wayy between myy pinkyy and myy fourth finger, too. pretty weird. 3. there is a 95% chance that this will not happen, but ray might move back up here to the bayy area from lalaland [L.A.]! that would be a dream come true for me. it sucks when best friends are separated byy distance. but i just realized something that i hope elleryy will neverr realize. i was thinking, and it is true that i have reallyy let go of the shield i usuallyy put up to stop people from hurting me. he is the onlyy person alive that knows myy deepest secrets. if he reallyy wanted to, he now has everyy tool to emotionallyy kill me. and this is reallyy dumb, but i even considered telling him the one secret that i have never told anyone, not even myself. yea, the me from two years ago would kill me for trusting that boyy like this. let's just hope he continues to live his life, not knowing of his own powers.