june fourth. hard to believe that two years ago, i was at home. it was a thursdayy. it was that one dayy that jessica was in l.a., where she just watched a midnight showing of the third harry potter movie. natalya was somewhere other than at school. as for me, i was "sick." yea. that one dayy that all three of us skipped school to celebrate the wonderful goodness of harryy potter. i miss those days. for serious. yesterdayy was natalya's birthdayy. i still can't believe that she changed on me like that one year ago. but i guess when you're homeschooled, youu miss out on some things. i can't believe that we fought over little things that do not matter anymore. like the wayy she talked about myy friends, myy ughh...[dare i sayy it??]boyfriend at the time. actuallyy, no. i had just broken up with him the dayy before when we talked on the phone. i needed support, i guess. that what i did was right. but she said i was stupid. that i made a bad choice byy saying the "maybe" that apparentlyy meant, yes, i would love to be your girlfriend. what did i know?? i got tired of her saying she was better than me. [k, wth, i didn't care if she was taking classes at the crappyy communityy college.] so with the word "bitch", i hung up on her. i bet we were both surprised. now, i think that hanging up wasn't the smartest thing to do. but i was upset. and stupid, apparentlyy. i guess myy eighth grade self just couldn't tolerate the fact that people change. boyy, have i gotten over that. how manyy more times shall i just stand there and listen to the words of those that i do not understand anymore?? tell me, how manyy more times do i have to act nonchalant while watching the people i know and love do things that theyy will one dayy regret?? i'm afraid myy bottom lip will actuallyy fall off one dayy due to the manyy times i've refrained from interfering byy biting it.