i don't know what it is, but i'm just not happy no matter how hard i try to be. i feel like so many things are missing. & i hate when my friends ask me if something is wrong, because i lie to them. i tell them i'm FINE, i'm not. I feel like i have nobody to run to, to talk to...the person i did..is no longer there. it's always a "i'll call you about it" thing. but no call. marissa HATES being around sad people, it brings her down. so...i won't talk to her about it.Melanie isn't someone i'd talk to about shit like this, or cry to at least. & you can DEFINITLY say that goes for Erika. i literally have nobody to talk to about this. I'm always the one people come to when they are sad, i'm the one telling them to cry on my shoulder. But do they ever ask me how i'm doing?...no. I guess i have lovely friends =[ maybe i just really suck at life. ughhh. homecoming is saturday. i doubt it will be fun. =/ i think i'm a pessimistic.