Things dont get easier when you grow up. It all only gets harder. Everything around me is failing, and no matter how bad i want to believe that its just "bad timing" or "fate" i know im the only one responsiable for the things around me. So whats the problem? I dont know what i want. I dont know where im going. I cant even breathe. Im traped under water thats iced over using the last bits of energy i have to find air again.

All this thats happening is for a reason, if fate was real your the perfect example. The way you came into my life and the way things pan out with us. Its never felt more destined. But what does destiny have to do with my heart? My heart and my head always have an epic battle but this time it feels like a battle to end all others, Part of me knows its not going ot last forever, im not a "forever" type of person. Part of me screams that if i could just open myself and completely hand it over that i would find a love to blow all the others out of the water. the same part screams that you wont hurt me like all the others. And then theres this destiny thing. The way things have happened reeks a "ment to be" thing. i guess the only real mystery is not how you got there but why your here now.

If i could just let go. If i could just move on. If i could just be friends. If....