"its scary when the thing that is depressing you is the only thing that can make you feel better at the same time." - me (like two seconds ago) I would like to start off by saying that today, was awesome. My party thing, wasnt the greatest, but it wasnt terrible. But i dont really care if everyone else had fun. Bc i enjoyed it. Today, we were just chillin in my living room, listening to music, and for some reason...i was really happy. The rain was pouring down and i had The Postal Service (the district sleeps alone tonight), and that special someone stuck in my head. I dont know what it is about that song, but it just makes me want to fall in love. its weird. But yeah. I looked back at my friends lined up on the couch, and i realized, in that moment, how much i love them all. I dont even think they noticed that i was acting weird... I know that i NEED my friends. Most of them anyway. Even some of the ones that werent there today. I dont know what i would do without them. I also realized that i think way too into things. A loved one made a comment yesterday about something, and i took it COMPLETELY the wrong way, and got really upset about it. Im really psycho about that. and insecure. Its not that i need someone to pet my ego. Its just. . i want to feel loved. And sometimes i take it for granted. And im sorry.