. They say that silence will make you crazy, so if noise will keep you sane, why do my ears feel like bleeding every time i scream your name? . Why is it that whenever i get that little inspirational "spurt" if you will, the results always wind up being angry, or about breakups or something to that effect? No matter how cheery my disposition, the fruits of my labor and creativity, so to speak, come out more on the pessimistic side. It really drives me crazy. . I think that dishonesty is the best policy. It seemed to keep you content, anyway. . I dont really understand it, all i know is that im sick of writing the same songs about the same subject matter. Not to mention one that i dont even have much experience in. . But sometimes you cant fly until you fall And after all the nails i've chewed off just hoping that you'd call, I realized the end wont come bc you never cared In fact, letting go is easier than i thought. . I hate being avoided. I hate not being spoken to at all. I hate that i let it get to me. I hate that i make it more than it is. . So maybe now i'll get some sleep. . And even though i know all of the things i SHOULD be doing right now, i ignore them, and continue dealing with it the best that i know how - being hurt, and wondering what I did wrong. I can't help it. I can't help but think that it WAS my fault. But i guess thats just something that I'll never get over. . You'll never know how much you meant to me, but what's done is done, There's no sense in living in the past, When the rest of my life has been waiting for so long. .