Howdy. Today is Wednesday. Well, today was a really good day. I worked and was very cheerful. I think when I am in a better mood it helps me deal with the kids better, rather than feeling stressed. It was a beautiful day outside today too. After work I came home and layed down for a while and talked to Emily on the phone. I havn't seen her in awhile or really talked to her so it was nice. I got off the phone with her & then went to Paula's house to straighten her hair again. I straightened it while I watched "American Idol"...I'm so glad that my girl Diana is still on there...she is awesome. After I got done we watched half of the Bachelor and then Alan got home and they had to leave so I left and now I am at home. Talking things over with God really does change your attitude and your heart. That is something that I used to do constantly...no decisions were made without discussing it with him. But of course, the past year or so...with being depressed, losing friends, my dad dying, being deceived and lied about, being broke and SO much more...it's just gotten the better of me. Which that is WHEN we really need to stand our ground, be like Job in the bible and just TRUST in God completely no matter what comes our way. But I have become so weakened spiritually. Not to say that I'm all "fresh & new" now b/c I'm not, but anyways- the point of me saying all of this is that I have had such an awesome day and it is because I trusted in God and bridged the gap that was between me & Him. Not that I havn't been talking to Him EVERY day because I do. Not a day goes by that I dont talk to him. But last night I kinda gave over some of my burdens to Him that have been needing to be given away! I also prayed about some situations in my life as well as other people's lives. I was doing good and reading my bible every night for awhile there and then recently, within the past month I got back out of that habit, but I picked it up last night and read a few chapters and it really did feed my soul. Today (although no different than any other day) I just felt an enormous amount of JOY fill my heart...the kind that can only be given by the Lord. :) ANyways- just wanted to share that. Oh some good news. Another wedding will be in my life haha. Rachel called me today to tell me that Ricky proposed to her last night!!! I am so excited. That is sooo awesome! He is a FABULOUS guy and I know he will treat her wonderful and make her happy for the rest of her life. She described her 1 carat ring to me and it sounds AWESOME. Congrats to both of them!!!! I feel kinda of like I was part of them getting together. Rachel met him the ONE night that she came to spend the night with me at my dorm at ETSU. He lived in Johnson City (Elizabethton)... they met at "The Planet" a year ago today actually hahaha. HOw sweet! Paula's wedding is in 3 days! We are going to get our hair done together Friday afternoon b/c her wedding is early Saturday morning. Well, that's about all for now I guess. I was gonna go see Jen's baby again, but didn't. Anyways- I'll talk to you later!!! "I Still Believe" By: Jeremy Camp (this is an awesome song...I wish I could have gone to his concert last week darn it!) Scattered words and empty thoughts seem to pour from my heart. I've never felt so torn before. Seems I don't know where to start. But it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain From ev'ry fingertip, washing away my pain 'Cause I still believe in Your faithfullness. 'Cause I still believe in Your truth. 'Cause I still believe in Your holy Word. Even when I don't see, I still believe. Though the questions still fog up my mind with promises I still seem to bear, Or even when answers slowly unwind, It's my heart I see you prepare. But it's now that I feel your grace fall like rain From ev'ry fingertip, washing away my pain. 'Cause I still believe in Your faithfullness. 'Cause I still believe in Your truth. 'Cause I still believe in Your holy Word. Even when I don't see, I still believe. Well, the only place I can go is into Your arms Where I throw to You my feeble prayers. Well, in brokenness I can see that this was Your will for me. Help me to know that You are near, yeah, 'Cause I still believe in Your faithfullness. 'Cause I still believe in Your truth. 'Cause I still believe in Your holy Word. Even when I don't see, I still believe. 'Cause I still believe 'Cause I still believe 'Cause I still believe 'Cause I still believe I still believe.