Things should get better. I say "should," though I want to say "had better." Nothing is really going that wrong. I am trying hard not to get sick though my sister and all three of her kids are. I am trying to find me a plaything (yes its bad for me to say it that way but I can't say girl because I am going on a mission). I am working hard at being a better person, and school is less that a week away. None of this seems to matter though. The kids I am avoiding so I don't get sick are the most important people in the house I live in, anything I do that is productive, or even notable, is degraded and slandered by my other sister, I don't have all the classes I want and none of them are available, and I still don't feel accepted in Utah. No friends, No girl, No home. I think most of this depression is Holiday based. Why the hell did they make special days when you are supposed to be with the ones you love and get kissed and party etcetera. I have enough to deal with without the added reminder that I am single and have no benefits. My biggest hope is that school will help me find new friends.