Still not going to school. I was talking with my mom this morning, about remodeling the house. She said that if we weren't using the equity of this house to pay for my college she'd remodel. Ouch. I don't want to actually tell her that I don't wanna go to college....but then again. My plans are soo unclear at the moment, it's just strange. I'd love to have this house remodled, I want to live in the attic, I've got it all planned out. But the thing is if I do go to college, it won't be here, so I won't be around when they remodel. So damn complicated. Not. Today I need to clean, write my outline and take a shower, busy fucking day. I actually ate this morning, wow, but it made me feel worse. My mom thinks it's stress...which is highly possible. But I don't think kids my age should have soo much stress that it causes them to be sick. she's got nothing to say. she's got bills to pay. she's got no one to hate. cept for me. she's got nothing but shame. she takes pills for pain. she's got no one to blame. cept for me Seether