yeah so i wrote a long-ass message about this entire frikkin weekend but my computer sucks and it screwed up, so now its gone... 3 days later, here i am... ill attempt to make this worthwhile. Firstly who knows what the hell blotto means??? this thing has wayyy too many choices for me to pick from for my mood... i'm not good with decisions (shelby knows that)!! Anyway things are getting weird with my whole situation...first i decided what the hell is wrong with me that we can only be friends (if then even) when life is all happy but when i need mental sanity from people, we cant be? what is wrong with me that it has to be this way? but then i decided that why the hell am i blaming myself for it? its not my fault, it is up to them. so i decided fine if they want to avoid seriousness, i'd avoid them...and then friday night happened...which was pure hell for me (lindsey gets it). Now i have uncovered other reasons for this whole rift which make me feel a little better, but also a crapload worse. In other news, deeds straightened my hair...who knew it could look that good? now im talking to eric pei on the cell and then finally go to sleep... btw, has anyone seen my house of the spirits book? on the first page inside are my initials... i swear i left it at parker and shelby's but they say its not there...keep an eye out for it!! Not gonna go to sleep with crappy thoughts in my head so yeah! Love ya! ~me