wow words i utter like be-be-beautiful girl i always seem to stutter as they unfurl my tongue tied twisted, stuck to the roof of my mouth weak and limp wristed, soft hand shake bad health. im not to sure what i means when i say I LOVE YOU i know it bursts out easily enough. its about all i can say. we arent completely open with each other even though we say we love each other. there's times when i want to say things and my tongue is in check. force it out? scream and shout make a fist and push it out well it should be easy to tell someone they are beautiful. to tell anyone. hollow be thy name? these words i use put me to shame. not worthy said i, the worst says you and so i die, i lie, oh woe is me to be true i should have to be honest i should have to be open to be with you i shouldnt hold back, though i seem to have no clue as to what to do or how to be a lover. lover. lover. i will treat you so good you whore what a waste of time. what a space and place to define. HEADWAY. MAKE SOME! well... sure why not? heck you only live once right? right. i think... i think i need a break, i dont want a break i want to be intense. i want to be up in that shit TWENTY FOUR and SEVEN. that way ill learn. that way ill find some more pieces to my puzzle. ok. ok! OK! O.K alright already its time to go steady steady dont rock the boat rock the note sing it high and mighty sing it low and flighty you fickle bitch where's you're next fix? looking at you from my hole in the wall looking at you from my soul free fall and you blink and stare. and i see. i see that you think im not there. so you show me some skin and you let loose your inner jive i gasp and i undo my belt so fast, i run i run i run i cant wait to arrive. undress my mind undress it all, line me up against the wall and take it all take it all empty my shell and seed me again. rekindle my life, annul my sin. born anew and born from within i grow and grow everything unto you. so now is it control? or is this still love. this aching to please, this burden of mine. it feels like i must ease it all of the time. the only way i know how is through tinsel town lies, and bright light bribes. and weasel and slithering and dirty thats my game. though rebirthed nothing has changed. my life is still the same. my life it is still that picture of when i was five sitting on the window pane. and when i was seven, in the sandbox city, on the mantel piece on the borders of the borders. on the edges of the curve. the task is to be resisting the waves and storms, to be the true force, to weather all forms. but cracks will appear... as they always do. nothing is so perfect that it lasts... well, except you. mid night cat fights moon light shines white the arena is lit survival of the fit majestic feline battle of might hissing and shackled and baring claws locked in to the ring no escape clause circling and arching backs they come together to exchange whacks Domesticated violent pussycats breakin' the laws. is it midnight madness in their eyes? the results of human breeding lies its our pleasure, their pain these minions over which we reign pure blooded felix on humans he relies what have we done to this petite royal beast this small delicate flower lovingly called sweet a cat is a dead thing no wild instinctual being dulled over time from free feast after feast