i think im over it now. i will talk to hutch tomorrow. last night was a big let down, and heartbreaking.

i was numb. i didnt feel anything. just awkwardness, all in my head was just silence. i wanted to leave. and i think i have to leave now. before its too late. it probably already is too late.

is that how i feel? recently i was saying i wanted to try. give me a chance. all those things. now im saying, i've had enough. and its not working lets end it. i didnt want to break up. you wanted to. now i think we should. i think so? maybe. we should. do it.

things in my head. it will be weird around the department. should i move out of the department. should i leave my office...

dont screw the crew! how true this phrase seems to be coming, especially with people around me and things i have read and seen lately.

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i need some peace.